Journal Entry

15 April 2003 ... Bad Habits

This topic has been on my mind for several days now. Because one of my bad habits is that I bite my lips. And I chewed a "hole" in my lip the other day. Something painful to think about all day long, huh.

It's a compulsive thing. I don't really realize I'm doing it. And even when I do realize I'm doing it, I can't always stop myself. And I hate it but I haven't figured out how to stop.

Another bad habit. I don't drink enough water. I live in the desert and I drink coke. This equals dry skin. which I also hate. How hard can it be to drink a few extra glasses of water? Not so hard, but then I drink another coke and then I have to start all over again. humph.

SO walks in and calls me a slob. hm. I think that's another bad habit. Yes, I tend to throw candy wrappers at the middle of the room. They sit there on the floor for days at a time before I finally pick them up and throw them away. eh. I am a slob.

I also have the bad habit of laziness. um. no. that is not the right word. After all, things that need to be done, do get done eventually.

Is it procrastination? Sure, but only for the mundane things. It's more along the lines of a lack of passion.

From The Van Gogh Blues, talking about passion:

That potential energy remains locked within us, unavailable most of the time because we doubt that anything much will come of unleashing it... It is as if we had a nuclear reactor within us but saw nothing on the horizon but a light bulb to light. Who would be motivated to put a nuclear plant on-line for such a paltry reward.


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